Damn these dreams.  Another dream where I cried and woke up crying.  This time, it wasn’t rappers, but instead it was a war scene, with a large group of people attempting to kill a single enemy.  There was a lull in the violence and the lone enemy approached the soldiers, apologized to them and then started to cry uncontrollably.  I did the same thing - just cried in my dreams and woke up doing the same.  Bizarre.

My friend Tracy seems to think it’s stress related, but I don’t feel stressed so I’m not sure that’s the culprit.  I do feel like I’m floating and directionless from time to time, but I am working on projects yet again, from my web sites to iPhone apps, but I still don’t know where I’m really going, I suppose.

So wtf is wrong with me and why am I having these dreams?  Is it despair?  Helplessness?  I was never good at dream interpretation and really not good at analyzing myself, so I’m waving the white flag for now.

In other news, my birthday is coming up in November and I am busy planning away and inviting people like crazy.  My guess is that for the 75 or so people I invited, maybe 20 will show up which is just *perfect*.  I get my close and personal friends here to party with me and celebrate the fact that I made it one more year on this planet and live it up intensely for one crazy night.  I’m not a big birthday person since I have very little emotional attachment to them after being raised Jehovah’s Witness for a good portion of my life, but they’re still fun to have.

Tonight, I’m hoping to not remember any of my dreams so I can wake up peacefully and start off my day better than the norm as of late.